Animal totems are an interesting thing, we do not always get what we want as a totem. Having more than one is the usual thing. My Native American birth totem that's aligned with the zodiac is the Wolf. (Mohawk in my ancestry.) You find your totems through experiences, both spiritual and mundane, animals will cross your path or appear in your life and your dreams, and you can seek your totem through ceremony and meditation as well. I always knew about my Wolf totem throughout my life, before I looked it up, and it was easy to accept because, hey, wolves are really cool! The Owl has also been ever-present in my life, also an easy-to-accept totem, so majestic and beautiful, wise and mysterious, powerful and stealth. Identifying with Owl is lovely. I love turtles very much also, they have been in my life not just crossing my path but in my house, my yard, whether I am looking for them or not, they exist in my life. So I accepted them as well, even though they're not so "cool", and there is a quite a lot to learn from them.
I have dismissed my personal totem for years, ignoring it, telling myself it's just a coincidence, there is nothing significant about an obnoxious black bird with a huge beak. Dismissing it like an annoying relative, someone you know is attached to you but you don't really want to deal with. In the last half of my life I have slowly come to accept that Raven, not Eagle, not Hawk, not "cool majestic bird that everyone admires" is with me. I don't even know what Raven represents, I have skimmed over Raven's meaning in various texts, and as there is more than one interpretation, I may just wait to ask the Mohawk shaman before I accept it.
So Raven, okay, let's get on with this journey, please forgive my dismissal of your significance, you are actually a magnificent, powerful creature.
side note: I understand that those who don't believe in Spiritual things will see this post as evidence of eccentricity, get over it :P if you are reading this there must be a reason ~ :)
