Free-floating Fatigue

If you find you're very fatigued and don't really know why, trying listening objectively to observe what other people around you do and say on a regular basis.
The fatigue could actually be from the content of conversation around you, or from negativity or control in attitude and behavior around you.
Fatigue can also be from diet, illness, physical or mental exhaustion, or lack of oxygen.
But if it's from the environment and people around you, then it will be very helpful to find that out. 

To demonstrate how surrounding social behavior affects a person, observe how you feel after watching an episode of Jerry Springer, for example. Try watching more than one in a row. Really observe how you feel, and then compare that to the way you feel after taking a walk on a beach on a sunny day, or taking a warm shower or bath, or spending time with a pet, or watching a show or movie with creativity and happy, positive content.

Also, Music we listen to influences our moods and even brain activity directly. It's not JUST an expression and validation of one's feelings and point of view, it's also an influence. So if you want to feel depressed, listen to dirges about depressing circumstances, hard times, and regret; if you want to feel sorry for yourself, listen to songs that lament about how life is so hard and lovers are so cruel; if you want to feel hostile, angry, and aggressive, listen to music that reflects those moods; if you want to feel calm, listen to songs that combine positive lyrics with harmonious music.

If you want to feel optimistic, happy, or strong, choose your music wisely. Absolutely pay attention to the lyrics and the attitude, not just the beat and the sound.

Conditioned Patriarchy And Bias

It's common for those (both men and women) who have been conditioned to believe that Patriarchal hierarchy is real to treat girls and women with measurably less respect overall than they treat boys and men.
This behavior is not dictated by the men or the boys, it's one's own behavior due to one's own perception, bias, and conditioned beliefs.
IT FEELS "RIGHT" to them to treat boys and men with more respect, more sympathy, more support, and more care, and it FEELS "OKAY" to be critical, resentful, and condescending toward girls and women.

Obviously this behavior and perception is not consistent straight across the board, but it's the general climate of most current human cultures; some more obvious, blatant, and shameless about it than others. In wealthier cultures, the media now plays a large role in conditioning people; in less wealthy cultures, political or religious leaders tend to play the largest role.

We see this behavior every day in any culture that's "Patriarchal", which is not ALL cultures, but most in the current era. The more gender role beliefs there are in a given community or culture, the more this can be seen.

~It's important to note that "Patriarchal Culture" does NOT mean that ALL boys and men are treated with favoritism or given respect or authority, nor does it mean that ALL girls and women are treated with oppression; it's the GENERAL structure of the culture; in fact in Patriarchal cultures, MANY boys and men are oppressed and bullied as well, by both controller/narcissistic men and women, and controller-women can be bigger oppressors of girls and other women, and in some cases of boys and men as well.
Both male and female Controllers will USE the dynamics of whatever "hierarchy" they happen to live in to control other people.
In Patriarchal cultures, it happens to be easier to assert oppression and control over women, because more people are "in on it", and fewer will protest, or even notice.
That means Controllers, male or female, have an advantage: most of the population is already in collusion that it's "okay" to disrespect, demean, and control individual members of half the population.

Notice that when a girl or woman is ignored, made fun of, condescended to, harassed, criticized, gossiped about, slandered, physically threatened, or ostracized from a clique, it's rare for anyone to stand up for her against the behavior.  But when a boy or man is treated in any of these ways, people will expect him to stand up for himself, and they will often stand up for him.

IN FACT, people will often CRITICIZE a girl or woman for standing up for herself against any of these behaviors, BUT will CRITICIZE a boy or man for NOT standing up for himself against the same exact behaviors.
This alone shows how deep the conditioning goes in most current cultures.


A disparity of respectful or disrespectful judgments and assumptions of others is usually at the top of the list of behaviors and perceptions.

For example, in public, if a person is seen with paint all over their clothes, say at the local Home Depot, it is their SEX, first and foremost, that changes others' assumptions about WHY the person is covered in paint. After their sex, they're judged on their size, demeanor, race, and age. (Not on actual information about them.)

If the person covered in paint is a man of any age or race, people will assume he's doing a JOB, and that it's a relatively important job, and that he probably knows what he's doing, he's probably a "pro". ~They will assume "pro" or at least "knowledgeable" about a man even if prejudice is present.
They might be right, but they may also be wrong; they have no way to know either way unless they know the man pretty well, and have actually watched him work for a length of time.

But if the person with paint on their clothes is a woman of any race, most people will likely assume much differently (based on zero information other than her appearance), such as that she must be HELPING a man paint, that it's not her actual "job", that she's been guided by someone else, that she has paint on her clothes because she doesn't really know what she's doing, or that she's TRYING to paint something "on her own". Some might even simply see her as a SLOB because she didn't change before going to the store (even to a paint supply store), or as a "poor person" who doesn't have any other clothes, which they are very UNLIKELY to assume about a man covered in paint.

In fact, many men learn young that if they LOOK LIKE they've been working, due to their appearance (suit and tie OR "work clothes"), that people will treat them with more respect, and so males who have Narcissism or immaturity issues will often purposely dress to appear as if they're in the middle of work, or not change or groom themselves (clean the paint, dirt, or grease off from work) when they go in public, like to an appointment, to lunch, to the bank, etc.
However, people tend only to treat women with "work-respect" if they're "well-groomed", dressed in business-type clothing or obvious uniforms. A female landscaper who goes to the bank during her day with grass, dirt, and sweat stains, and imperfect hair, will just get treated like she's a slob or a crazy person, while her male coworker will get treated with "respect" no matter how he looks.
~Again, still conditioning from childhood: Daddies, Uncles, Grandfathers and other men can have any kind of job and be "important" or at least "respected", but women can only have certain kinds of jobs, so if they're "dirty" or "messy" they must be slovenly, not in the middle of work.
(Conditioned people will do this judgment disparity even if they SEE the woman doing that work.)

Again, it's not the men or boys who are creating this disparity, it's within the minds of those who are doing the judging.

For another example, if a man is working, more people tend to "leave him be so he can concentrate on what he's doing because it's important". But if a woman is working on something, more people tend to try to get her attention IN SPITE of what she's doing, and sometimes they do it BECAUSE she's working on something.
Men are to be "left alone when they're working", as if there's an invisible barrier around them that we are not supposed to cross when they're doing something. But when a woman is working on something, it seems to be an INVITATION to approach her.
This particular behavior is often a direct reflection of a person's childhood home, where "Daddy is working, leave him be", but everyone (often including Dad, unfortunately) interrupts Mom no matter what she's doing, and expects her full attention.
Usually brother and sister are each treated with the same disparity, brother is left alone while he's working, playing, or learning, and sister is frequently and randomly interrupted regardless of what she's doing.

Another common behavior that's related to the last is when a man is doing something, women especially tend to assume that he "knows what he's doing", and is "doing something purposeful", but when a woman is doing something, both women and men seem to feel no qualms about approaching her and trying to CORRECT her, criticize her, insult her, "manage" her, re-direct her, argue with her, or even take over.
In fact, it appears that people are often COMPELLED to approach a woman in order to judge, criticize, "assist", or stop her when they see her doing something or talking about something (anything), as opposed to the way they tend to respect the space and intention of a man when they see him doing something. A man might be offered help in a respectful way, but people tend to treat women like they NEED help, like they don't really know what they're doing or what they're talking about, and as if it's perfectly "okay" to criticize them, ADVISE them, or even physically approach them and "assist them", or take over, without asking permission.
It's a habit of LACK of respect for the PERSON, combined with a feeling of power and false confidence one apparently gets from assuming superiority over another person.

~Of course some men are treated with this sort of disrespect as well on a regular basis, and some women are treated with less of it, and that's usually based on the person's height and/or demeanor.
Those who seem intimidating to a person (male or female) get treated with more "respect", and those who seem non-intimidating get treated with much less. This disparity demonstrates the lack of inner ethics and values in others; they're treating others according to whether the other person seems intimidating or not, not according to inner principles.

* (There are not enough cultures in human groups that have genuine "Matriarchal" hierarchies to make clear comparisons with Patriarchal cultures. Usually "Matriarchal" cultures aren't really fully Matriarchal, with the same power disparity that is commonly seen in Patriarchal cultures; there is usually more shared "power" and respect between the sexes, but there are still often gender roles and allowance of male dominance, at least in Homo Sapiens. likely due to fear of other groups of humans.
In Homo Sapiens, "warriors" are typically treated with admiration or high honors* (see next footnote) because people fear being invaded by other Homo Sapien groups. Humans are an aggressive, bullying, gain-driven species overall, more like Chimpanzees than other primates, and so people naturally fear other groups of humans because they're aware of this at least on a subconscious level; therefore they tend to hold "warrior males" in high esteem, because the more "warrior males" one's group has, the more secure and safe one feels from being invaded by other groups.)

* (In many cultures, "warriors" who are held in higher esteem by some are regarded with contempt or disrespect by others, likely due to feelings of envy.
Resentment of "warrior types" being treated with higher esteem in general is not the same thing as envy toward individual people. One can resent the disparity in the culture without resenting a PERSON who is being put on a pedestal by others.
I can guarantee that most of the people I know would treat a large male professional boxer (or even an amateur male rock musician) much better than they treat me, right off the cuff, without knowing anything about him, but that's not the boxer's fault. HE didn't tweak their inner ethics compass in order for them to adulate him and 'diss' me, THEY are doing that all on their own, with a lot of help from their cultural conditioning.

However the more Narcissism there is in a culture, the more contempt can be seen between different subgroups and "factions", because the people will create cliques out of their differences between one another, and try to control other groups. Envy, self-righteousness, and power struggles are rife in cultures that are loaded with Narcissism, and so "warriors" will either be raised on very high pedestals by some, and disrespected and attacked by others, because everything is seen through dramatic emotional reaction and not through calm, objective observation.
~~~ALSO, in Narcissistic cultures, people are USED and then discarded when they are no longer "useful", which happens to BOTH males and females in the culture. Whatever they were being USED for, when they don't or can't fulfill that use anymore, they are discarded by those who are part of the Narcissism culture.)

What It's Like To Be A Target Of A Narcissist

If you don't know what it feels like to be a Target of a Narcissist, and you want to learn:
(shortcut at bottom of page)

~Ask someone to follow you around all day and randomly sit in your lap whenever they want attention, no matter what you're doing.

~Ask them to climb on your back and ride on you, directing you where to go, while you're walking in the store, at work, or in the park.

~Ask them to go with you to the store and tell you what to buy for yourself, and criticize anything that you pick.

~Have them stand between you and anyone you're trying to speak to.

~Tell them not to respond or reply to anything you say, including direct questions.

~Tell them to change the subject back to themselves any time you talk about anything.

~Ask them to walk in front of you when you're going somewhere,  stand in front of you to block your view of anything you're looking at.

~Ask them to watch, assess, and correct everything you do.

~Tell them that anything at all that you talk about is a request for their advice.

~Explain to them to think of you, see you, and hear you as categorically inferior to them ( in nearly every way), and to treat you as such.

~Explain to them that they are now in charge of you, because they're smarter, stronger, more experienced, and generally better than you (regardless of reality), and to treat you as such.

~Ask them to praise others profusely, comparing them to you, and to give others your money and your stuff.

~Ask them to purposely treat others visibly better than they treat you, and with obviously more respect.

~Tell them to stare at you, and to critique your appearance all the time.

~Tell them to behave only according to their emotions, reactions, and cravings, and not to apply values, respect, or ethics to their behavior.

~Ask them to make a LIST OF RULES for you to live by, according to how they view your sex, ancestry, size, age, and overall appearance.

~Have them follow you around with a magnifying glass, like Sherlock Holmes, critiquing everything you do and say, and have them feel entitled to do so as if they're your personal authority and keeper.

~Ask them to counter or invalidate every thing you say, "No I don't think that's true... No, you shouldn't feel that way....That's not a good restaurant, the one I like is better....You didn't see an eagle, it was probably a hawk...No, it's not going to rain...No, asparagus is very good, you're wrong....No, I didn't notice that he treated you that way, you're exaggerating...No you're wrong, it's like this..."

~Ask them to narrate everything they see, hear, and feel, and announce everything they've done all week, all month, and all year, and everything they're going to do.

~Tell them to interrupt you every time you speak, especially if there are other people present.

~Tell them not to answer when you call them or message them, but to complain that they can't get in touch with you.

~Ask them to make insulting, demeaning remarks about you and to you when others are present.

~Ask them to REDO or rearrange anything and everything that you did, including your own stuff, your own work, and your own appearance, because you didn't do it "right" or "good enough".

~Tell them to threaten you with abandonment, rejection, eviction, disinheritance, ruin, slander, or physical harm every time they feel UPSET with you ~ (whether you did anything wrong or not, and regardless of the triviality of whatever they're upset about).

Or a shortcut:

~Let them boss you around all day long, with you doing literally ONLY what they want you to do, and NOTHING ELSE. This includes food, grooming, clothing, sleep, any activities, work, bill paying, spending, who you talk to and what you say, appointments, speech, emotions, what TV shows you watch, or whether you watch TV, making your bed, the way you make coffee, whether you DRINK coffee or not, the way you walk, etc.
~If you forget and do something that you want or need to do, without their permission, tell them to "punish" you somehow, by giving you the cold shoulder, raging, raging with crying, calling others to tell them you're abusing them, saying or doing something mean to you, threatening to hit you, actually hitting you, not allowing you to eat or sleep, making you lose your job, slandering you to others, or destroying or hiding your stuff.

Do this for at least at least a week straight, with absolutely no interruption or break, and without talking to anyone else about any of it; no outside allies, no support, no "whining" to others.

Controllers Can Only Lead Or Follow

Point of view of a Controller:
Imagine that when you're walking with someone you know, you have to either be in front of them or behind them.
You can not walk beside them.
Not because the path or aisle is too narrow, but because you are not comfortable unless you are Leading the person.
If you are following them, it's either because you see them as an authority figure whom you admire and want to be associated with, OR you don't see them as above but you are "submitting" to their lead grudgingly, resentfully, and only because you can't do something without them; OR, you don't want them to see what you're really doing behind their back, and you don't take their "lead" seriously (you're the 'real' leader).
You have to be either the leader or the follower, you don't actually comprehend "cooperation", "companionship", or "equality".

If the other person asks you to please stop following them or leading them and walk beside them, you will take their request as a command, and either follow it because you see them as the Leader, or argue with them for saying it because you see yourself as THEIR Leader.

The only exception to this is when a Controller sees another person as equally awesome and elite as themselves, so they see them as a "buddy" or a "partner". But the joke is on them, because Controllers usually choose other Controllers to be "buddies" with, and it's only a matter of time before the power struggles start to show.