Controllers Are Obstacles In Front Of Your Goals

Having focus on a personal project, mission, goal, and/or task is one of the "happiness" or "contentment factors" for a healthy human being.

This does include playing a personal role in a larger project, mission, goal, or ongoing organization. 

Since this is a significant factor for the health and happiness, confidence and fulfillment of healthy humans, it's also a target for bullies, controllers, and Narcissists.

If they can prevent a person from progressing toward their own goal, they feel powerful, and indeed gain a kind of power over the person.

If they can prevent and block a person from participating and contributing their personal abilities to the larger group, family, project, community or organization, they have successfully sabotaged several things that would have been beneficial, even essential, for that person's well-being, health, and growth, both present and future. 

One of the creepier examples of this is when a controller tries to prevent a parent from caring for their own child, guiding their own child, teaching their own child real values and ethics, and supporting and protecting their child.
Also, trying to prevent a person from caring for or about their spouse or partner, friend, or other relative.
This clearly demonstrates how the desire for control over others has absolutely nothing to do with "making others do the right thing because they don't know any better".

When others stand between you and a personal goal, (POSITIVE goal, that is), a project, mission or task, whether it's caring for your child, rescuing an animal, buying a home, getting a job, singing a song, going to school, building a shed, learning an instrument,  or painting a picture, they are not trying to "help", they are trying to insert themselves in your business in order to get a fix of control, and to block you from progress.

See it for what it is, and go around them. Block them out.
If you have to, go do what you were doing somewhere else, away from them.

You may want to involve them, or to get their approval, because you know that letting Controllers believe they're a part of something you're doing (and getting credit for it, and leading) means they're likely to do less to block you. But that's an illusion, they'll still block you or try to control you, they'll just do it in more of a Passive Aggressive way. Controllers don't comprehend boundaries or respect, so it's inevitable. If they're involved in any way, they WILL try to take control at some point, and if they can't, they'll probably cause damage instead.

Keep your goals, projects, missions, tasks and activities "online", don't shut them down in order to avoid a Controller's consequences. Go around. It does take more effort than if there was no Controller in the way, but take it for what it is, an obstacle on the course.

Monkey See Monkey Do: Bias For One Sex Is Learned

Bias for one sex or the other, and against one sex or the other, is generally learned by watching the way people treat one another during childhood, especially in our immediate families, but also in the larger community. Then when a person grows up, they generally judge the sex they are biased FOR through rose-colored glasses, assuming and projecting positive capability, motives, and character onto them. They tend to judge the sex they learned to be biased against through a cloud of negativity and self-righteousness, as if the members of that sex automatically deserve to be under a microscope and on trial.

Humans do the same thing with race and ancestry. Bigotry is bigotry, whether it's bias for or against another person's sex or race, or even age group.

Humans will do this regarding ancestry traits within their own race as well.

Those who we are biased FOR (either as a member of a group or as an individual) we "make way for", give more resources, respect, time, and positive attention to, willingly and respectfully assist them, recognize and honor their achievements, accomplishments, and character, and tend to believe in their capability, intelligence, and wisdom without making them "prove it". We also tend to believe them without double-checking their facts or doubting their motives. 

Those who we are biased AGAINST we tend to treat in the opposite way, whether we're biased against them as members of a certain group, or as an individual.
We'll nonchalantly or directly block them, dismiss them, argue with them, try to prove them wrong, and ignore them. We'll ignore, dismiss, and criticize their achievements and goals, and apply negative motives to them. We'll say negative things about them instead of positive things in conversation. We'll treat them as if they are incapable, inexperienced, weak, stupid, silly, or crazy. We'll deny them resources, even sabotage their progress and goals, and refuse to make effort for them like we do with those whom we are biased FOR.   

Whatever biases are common in a local community and culture, Narcissists will capitalize on. Some of them believe stereotypes and cultural prejudices are real, while sociopaths will use them in order to manipulate and oppress whether they believe them or not.

(Narcissists figure out quickly who's a** to kiss in order to get accepted and get ahead, and who it's okay to treat with disrespect because everyone else is bigoted against them or scapegoating them too. Many also seem to intuitively know that in each crowd there are different biases, so while in one crowd, everyone is biased against black men, in the next crowd everyone is biased against Hispanic women, and in the next it's white men, and in the next it's blond-ancestry women, and so on. A sociopathic Narcissist will morph into whatever crowd they're in, and find a way to be a member of the "in crowd" within that group, adapting the group's bully, bigot, and bias behaviors.)

Good Vs. Evil

Remember that Evil is as evil does.
It will always try to rationalize and justify, and it will try to make itself appear to be "good", "knowledgeable", "strong", "straightforward", and "important".

But it is revealed not in words nor appearance, but in actions; in what it's actually doing.

Good is also revealed in actions, and in cause and effect; not in description, intention, nor appearance. 

Evil likes to make itself into judge, jury, and prison guard, because it's a way to control others that appears "righteous".

Good wants to find solutions and plans that are of mutual benefit for all, while preserving the freedom and dignity of the individual.

Evil wants to own, control, or destroy places, things, and people.  Good does not.

The reason it seems that evil "always wins" is because evil is driven, obsessively, to "own", control, or destroy, and will destroy whatever is in the way of its "goal", like a charging rhino across a field of bunny rabbits. Evil doesn't care what or who it stomps, it just wants, and figures out ways to get what it wants.

Good is much stronger than evil, it's just not driven, obsessive, or destructive by nature.

Is He or She The "Right One"?

"Is my partner really Mr. or Ms. Right?"

You've won Powerball, but in order to collect you have to break up with your spouse or partner, (no fake-outs allowed where you get back together later in secret), what would you do?

What if THEY won Powerball and had the same requirement, what would they do?

If the answer for either of you is "break up, collect the money, it's a once in a lifetime shot", then you're not "in love", and you're probably not the right person for each other.
Seems like there should more to this story, but there's really not.