J.R.R. Tolkien

Tolkien sings the troll song






Troll Sat Alone on His Seat of Stone


Troll sat alone on his seat of stone,
And munched and mumbled a bare old bone;
For many a year he had gnawed it near,
For meat was hard to come by.
Done by! Gum by!
In a cave in the hills he dwelt alone,
And meat was hard to come by.


Up came Tom with his big boots on.
Said he to Troll: 'Pray, what is yon?
For it looks like the shin o' my nuncle Tim.
As should be a-lyin' in the graveyard.
Caveyard! Paveyard!
This many a year has Tim been gone,
And I thought he were lyin' in the graveyard.'


'My lad,' said Troll, 'this bone I stole.
But what be bones that lie in a hole?
Thy nuncle was dead as a lump o' lead,
Afore I found his shinbone.
Tinbone! Skinbone!
He can spare a share for a poor old troll,
For he don't need his shinbone.'


Said Tom: 'I don't see why the likes o' thee
Without axin' leave should go makin' free
With the shank or the shin o' my father's kin;
So hand the old bone over!
Rover! Trover!
Though dead he be, it belongs to he;
So hand the old bone over!'


'For a couple o' pins,' says Troll, and grins,
'I'll eat thee too, and gnaw thy shins.
A bit o' fresh meat will go down sweet!
I'll try my teeth on thee now.
Hee now! See now!
I'm tired o' gnawing old bones and skins;
I've a mind to dine on thee now.'


But just as he thought his dinner was caught,
He found his hands had hold of naught.
Before he could mind, Tom slipped behind
And gave him the boot to larn him.
Warn him! Darn him!
A bump o' the boot on the seat, Tom thought,
Would be the way to larn him.


But harder than stone is the flesh and bone
Of a troll that sits in the hills alone.
As well set your boot to the mountain's root,
For the seat of a troll don't feel it.
Peel it! Heal it!
Old Troll laughed, when he heard Tom groan,
And he knew his toes could feel it.


Tom's leg is game, since home he came,
And his bootless foot is lasting lame;
But Troll don't care, and he's still there
With the bone he boned from its owner.
Doner! Boner!
Troll's old seat is still the same,
And the bone he boned from its owner!


John Ronald Reuel Tolkien

Rachel Lucas Is Hilarious Dot Freakin Com

First Synthetic Cell Holds Promise for Biodiesel and Green Heating Oil | HeatingOil.com

First Synthetic Cell Holds Promise for Biodiesel and Green Heating Oil | HeatingOil.com

"Dr. Craig Venter shook the scientific world and sparked a fresh debate over bio-ethics when he announced on Thursday that his team had successfully created the first synthetic cell."...

Leaps and bounds... let's try and hold on to this future!

Physicists Achieve Quantum Teleportation Across a Distance of 10 Miles

GET THE **** OUT OF HERE!
How far can you beam information instantaneously? Try 10 miles, according to a study in Nature Photonics that pushes the limits of quantum teleportation to its greatest distance yet. At that distance, the scientists say, one can begin to consider the possibility of someday using quantum teleportation to communicate between the ground and a satellite in orbit.
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Beautiful Women Get Cheated On Big Time

If everyone is envious of the beautiful girl, who exactly is treating her like a princess? Besides, "beauty" is so subjective it's not even funny. Ask 10 guys AND girls to rate a random woman's looks, and you will get 10 different answers. (Unless they are allowed to look at the other group members' answers, then they'll do the group-monkey-troupe-whoop and all say they agree.) Looks may be an attraction factor, but when beauty is the main feature that a person is dating someone for, that spells "toy", not "friend". M-O-O-N, that spells friend! A really real romantic relationship would be a lot like if your best friend/brother from another mother suddenly turned into the hotness of your dreams; someone that you are attracted to AND you respect tremendously, AND love to hang out with. A real friend with benefits, you wouldn't want to cheat on them, just like you don't think about replacing your buddy with a "cooler dude"...  


Apprentice

Thank you.
Gratitude for pointing to my attitude,
I needed your help to find it.
These hidden corners of my heart hide all manner of nasties;
they must be swept from time to time.
The dark hallways of the mind are places for monsters to lurk;
please do shine your torch on them,
tell me where and who and how they are!
You have given my comings and goings much attention,
what of your own tasks have you put aside for me?
I am ever grateful for such thoughtful reflection,
and to think, all I expected from you was a warm cup of tea.
Dancing and singing to thee, dear friend,
I know that is what you wish for me:
to live a life free from worry and pain,
free from slander and glaring disdain.
I can see that you wish for me laughter and celebration,
infinite love, eternal elation!
Each tear in the parchment of my soul that you point out
for me to fix makes a lovelier message to send;
every open wound on my back that you salt
is a hole that hadn't healed, that I can now see to mend.
Tell me! Shout to the world!
Tell everyone of your supposition!
I am grateful for these calumnies.
Each aspersion is a step toward Heaven.
Thank you.
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