Racism Sexism Misogyny Misandry Blondes Redheads

Prejudiced people are just doing what they did when they were 4 and 5, trying to group people together and separate differences, trying to get a feeling of importance for themselves. If they are a boy, there will always be a boy in the class who has self-importance issues, and declares boys to be better than girls, and tries to rally all the boys to follow along. There is often a girl in the class who does the same thing with the girls. There is usually at least one kid who does it with hair color, ancestry or skin color, rallies all the kids who otherwise would not have thought twice about it to be in a little "club" (so that kid can be the leader of said 'club') against other kids who "aren't like them", and there are often teachers, parents, and other adults who do little or nothing about any of it, or make it worse. Prejudiced adults are doing the exact same thing as they did then, they just never grew out of it. Giant toddlers, lol. Giant bottle in one hand, huge sagging diapers, and a big huge pacifier square in the middle of their face. And don't forget soft, cuddly Blankie :) Next time you or someone you know makes a sexist put-down, a racist remark, a snotty mean comment about someone with different hair color or a certain body type, remember they are showing their inner King or Queen Toddler.

Not My Brother's Keeper

The emotional well-being of those around us IS our responsibility, and if people didn't shrug that off so much, there would be a lot less sadness, anger, and fear. When another person is upset in some way, if we mean to be a friend or a comfort to them, we must keep in mind that our goal is to be there with them mentally, and lead them back into a more neutral emotional state. Just like a bottle of soda that gets shaken up, our emotions shake up the chemicals in our brains. That's ALL humans, unless there is brain damage. When someone is upset, whether it's anger, sadness, fear, rage, depression, or terror, we ARE our "brother's and sister's keeper", not their Authority Master to shut them down with aggression or put downs. A true friend listens, and listens, and talks, and listens, and seeks to give companionship, and seeks to help the other person come gently back to feeling grounded again.

Brain Washing For Dummies

How do you keep control over a person, a group, a society, a country, a world?
You simply create chaos so people don't have time to think, to relax, to become inspired. You try to convince them that their ideas are silly, their observations are dumb, and that there is no hope for their aspirations. You do not give them time or space to heal, or to become inspired, or to build their strength and resources.  
You create hostility, fear, prejudice, heartbreak and anxiety so their brain's energy is spent in the Amygdala, instead of the Cortex. 
 
The Amygdala is the part of the brain that deals with emotions. 

The Cortex is the part of the brain that thinks and plans.

Those who realize what is going on, especially in personal relationships, can definitely recover, and usually do. The controller person often reacts with rage when their puppet strings are exposed.
In larger groups or agencies, when several people are involved in the manipulation, they often react with self-righteousness, convinced that they are somehow superior and entitled to treating other humans this way for a "bigger cause". They will often try to redirect the aware person, and sabotage them in different ways. If this does not work, they can smear their reputation so no one takes them seriously. If it still doesn't work, they might just rub them out.  
The aware person would often choose death than life as a caged animal, so the manipulators still don't "win".

Are You A Good Person?

People who are trying to prove that they are "one of the Good People" in a family or group often develop a habit of trying to "bag" others. Scapegoats are common in this kind of dynamic, there is one person who everyone uses as a dumping ground for criticism. That way, they always have someone to point at, away from themselves. Children often do this before they are taught to take accountability f... or their own actions; they will "tattle" on another child in order to feel important and above blame. It makes them feel like a temporary adult. However in groups where there is scapegoating going on already, many members of that group will pick up this behavior in order to avoid becoming a Scapegoat. Reporting to others what one of the members of the group is doing "wrong" is common, but promoting the well being of that person is not the goal. They will say they are "concerned", but they will not call that person directly and try to be their friend, or talk about them in good ways, or promote their interests or accomplishments. They will just keep trying to "bag" that person to others in order to get "policing" points, and there is always a lot of secret talking about other members.

Communicating Vs. Insulting

The difference between communicating about issues and insulting another person's character is as stark as night and day. The communicator will say "I feel like you don't care about me when you do this~ " or "What was the reason you did or said this~" or "I feel very depressed and I don't know what to do" or "I would like us to communicate better by learning some skills from a professional" or "I am extremely sad or depressed" The insulter will reply "You always feel like nobody cares about you! You need help!" or "I'm sick of you constantly asking me my reasons for things, I am what I am. You're too sensitive, and you're always complaining." or "YOU feel depressed! You have the easiest life I've ever seen, and all you do is complain!" or "Every guy/girl you were ever with, and ever will be with, you will badger with this 'communication' crap! You are the one who needs help!" or "You're just trying to get attention! Just get over it already! My God you are driving me crazy!" Ironically, when the insulter speaks to the communicator, they are met with empathy, friendship, and help if needed. If the communicator finally gets fed up with the insulter and insults back, all hell breaks loose, and the insulter will accuse the communicator of being an abuser. So, the communicator is always the giver of empathy, and never the receiver of empathy. (Unless the insulter is in a certain mood). It will not change unless the insulter changes it, and they usually don't even know they're doing it; to them, they're just defending themselves in the way they learned, and they are often oblivious to the damage they do, or to the positive effects they experience from receiving empathy, friendship, and help.