Objective Observation And Healthy Boundaries

"Healthy boundaries" and having "objectivity" means that one can observe virtually anything from a detached point of view, (as opposed to attached), without taking "sides", without casting judgment, without seeking to be right or someone else to be wrong, just seeing what's there.

There is no "right" or "wrong" when one looks at a shoe box. It's just a shoe box.

If one has traumatic memories regarding a shoebox, then one may have negative feelings toward any random shoebox.
If one inserts speculation about how the shoebox was made, or whether it was made in a sweatshop, or whether using trees to make cardboard is wrong, or if they think sweatshops are wrong, then they aren't observing the shoebox anymore, they are interjecting speculation, judgment, politics, their own version of morality, and their own opinion.
If I open the shoebox and there's a dead mouse inside, then I will have a harder time keeping judgment out of my observation of the shoebox, I'll be angry that some human closed an animal up in the box and let it die. So I won't be objective anymore, and my ability to observe and understand will be much less clear.

I would need to "regroup" and deal with my feelings in order to regain objectivity.

If I want to find out who did it, then I had better really regain my objectivity, because I will be prone to thinking of a person who I want to blame for it BEFORE I actually find out any real information, and that WILL direct my thought process, I will be more likely to try to find evidence that the person I want to blame is guilty, instead of actually finding out what really happened.

Objectivity is very difficult for humans in general, which is why "scientific method" was created.
It's harder for some than others.
The more ego injury or inflation a person is dealing with, the harder it is for them to be objective.
The harder it is for them to listen to or view information that they don't BELIEVE IN personally, that they don't identify with personally.
(If it doesn't make them feel good, they'll argue about it.)

The more objectively one is able to view and observe things, events, situations, and people around them, the less they try to lay blame, cast shame, control, create "sides", argue, or feel resentment, favoritism, or FEAR.

And therefore the clearer they can observe, the more information they can take in and comprehend, the easier they can hear information and gather information, and the easier it is to choose their actions consciously, instead of reacting emotionally.

Separating From Average Narcissistic People

Tip regarding separating from most average Narcissistic people, (other than the stalking or directly abusive):
Simply stop responding, engaging, and giving them positive or negative attention.

You don't need to blatantly ignore them or cold-shoulder them, just stop engaging with them. The point is not to "send them a message", when is the last time you got a message through to a Narcissist?
What will likely happen (except for stalkers/psychopaths) is that they will lose interest in you, because you are not giving them anything.
You're a dry well.
You're a stone in a remote field somewhere.
Narcissists only "like" people and connect with people who give them something they want, even if it's seemingly negative. 

They will now be getting from engaging with you:
No adrenaline rush, no feeling of domination, no challenge, no other supply.
You are now giving them:
No ego-feeding, no caretaking, no catering. no argument, no anxiety reaction, no drama, no praise, no positive or negative feedback.   

When they invite you to a party (so they can leave you out of conversation, say something humiliating to you in front of others, change the date or time, or expect you to clean),
just say you have something else to do that day.
And watch yourself to make sure you don't feel guilt or shame, or anxiety about not going. 
(Remember the old joke about needing to wash one's hair?) 

When they strike up a conversation with you so they can argue with whatever you say, just agree with whatever they say, don't vocalize any of your own opinions or knowledge, and then excuse yourself gracefully. (If you make it look like you're leaving because they're getting on your nerves, that will give them a twinge of supply.)

When they invite you "out" (so they can look "better" than you, or use you as "bait", or leave you out, or leave you behind, or act superior) don't go, have something else (boring) to do, or be tired.

When they change plans and times on you, let them, and then you can't go.

When they are obviously trying to get your praise or attention, give them a polite acknowledgement, but nothing more.

Yes it can feel like arrogance and coldness, but it's not, it's simply not engaging with a person who is trying to provoke you to react and give them something.
If they are not Narcissistic, then you haven't done damage to the relationship, and they will not abandon or discard you (or fly into some kind of tantrum).
If they are Narcissistic, then they'll drift away like there was never any relationship between you, like they barely knew you, and you'll be free from dealing with them.

Most average narcissistic people get bored with people who don't cater to them, or who they can't make react, or who doesn't "challenge" them.
When narcissists are bored with a person, they seek another source of supply.

Consumer Alert: Girls And Boys Clothing

If you don't understand "Gender Role Conditioning", or believe it, just go to Wal Mart, or any clothing store, and look at the shorts for little boys, and then stroll over to the girls dept. and look at the shorts made for them (all by people you don't know).
Look at the length of the shorts and the quality.
You really think that little boys and little girls are designing those shorts? Or making them? Or putting them in the stores? You really think that's THEIR "natural preference" because of their gender, and if adults didn't dress OTHER little boys and girls in those same clothes, that they would still want to wear them?
Please.

Now that you noticed the difference in the shorts that are available for people to buy, and that people put on their children whether the kids like them or not, and in a lot of cases whether the clothes are appropriate or not for age, weather, or where they're wearing them, go look at the difference in quality of shirts, pants, and underwear, and long underwear. Look at the difference in COATS. Look at the difference between men's flannel shirts and women's flannel shirts. In the make and quality of dress clothes.

Look at the prices while you're at it. Why is the same brand of shirt or pants a different quality between male and female "styles", and why the price difference?
It's all for the same reasons. 

AND SO, if men and boys are SO MUCH TOUGHER, then WHY do they seem to need MUCH WARMER CLOTHES than women and girls do, for the same climate?
Oh right... because girls and women don't go outside... or work... yeah that's it... lol.
Watch some more television.

Oh while you're at it, go see if you can find steel-toed boots in the men's section, you know the boots that people wear to PROTECT their toes because they don't want to get hurt... (owie!) ~ now go look to see if you can find them in the women's shoe department, how many are there? Because there should be MORE, since women are so fragile and need more protection...don't they?

This is NOT the "fault" of the men or the boys or the women or the girls who are wearing the clothes, they aren't the ones making them and distributing them.
But we CAN be aware of what we are BUYING, and what we are dressing our children in.

What are we putting on our kids, and WHY?

The Impression You Give May Not Be The One They Get

The "impression" you are giving to those who are on a higher level of awareness, who have functional empathy and abstract reasoning ability, is not at all the same as the "impression" that those with a lower level of awareness, emotional maturity, empathy function, or reasoning ability are getting of you.

You don't look the same to everyone who's meeting you or looking at you, and in many cases, not even close to the same.

And in most cases, even those with clearer perception don't see you exactly as you see yourself. They can't, it's not really possible, even if they are a highly aware and mature individual; they only know a couple of things that they can see, or think they can see. They would need time to get to know you and learn more about you, just like you would need to learn about them.

For those who are less aware and mature, they are looking at you through a stack of thick filters in their own mind.
Bias for or against people who look like you,
prejudice for or against your gender or race,
assumptions and stereotypes about you because of your height, or your weight, your build,
your hair color and the way it's styled,
your clothing,
your accent or speech pattern,
etc. ad infinitum.

It is very possible that they are comparing you to various characters from television, film, music, CARTOONS, politics, history, childhood, etc., and trying to find one that matches your looks (in their mind.)
People do this a lot, but those with mental illness are more likely to believe that your personality is JUST LIKE the character or person they think you resemble. So if you remind them of a girl they couldn't stand in school, you must be "just like that girl". If you remind them of a certain Aunt who was afraid of dogs, YOU must also be afraid of dogs.
If you remind them of a nude-magazine model, well, that can get not so funny very quickly.

The less maturity, reasoning ability, clarity of perception and functional empathy (not sympathy) a person has, the more they are likely to judge others in all kinds of left-field, imagination-based, tales-from-childhood ways, and so are not going to even be able to see you for "who you are".
Further, they are much more likely to believe that they know "all about you" from a few superficial traits, or from hearsay, or from hearing you speak, or seeing your posts online. Or even from your car, your shoes, or your job, or people they saw you speaking with.

However those who DO have higher reasoning ability, empathy function, clarity, and emotional maturity are much more likely to see you closer to who you really are, and to treat you with civility, manners, and respect.

So if someone treats you poorly for "no reason", (nothing you did that was inconsiderate, manipulative, or aggressive...for real...)
it's probably because of their own limited perception and discernment and reasoning ability.

When you find yourself dealing with a person who has some sort of authority over you, or poses a direct threat, and this limitation seems to be the case, it's probably best not to let on that you think they're limited in perception; just keep it as peaceful and calm as you are able so you can figure out how to get away from them as quickly and unscathed as possible.
(Those who have limited perception toward others, with limited maturity, are also more likely to be histrionic, volatile, and reactive.)
.
.