Narcissist
behavior that can also be found in immature adults who don't really
have the disorder, or otherwise mentally/emotionally ill people:
~Making it difficult for a person to get even simple tasks done:
creating extra steps, extra obstacles, extra hardship, extra drama, and even giving wrong or incomplete information or instruction.
~Inserting themselves in between a person and their goal, so the person has to go through them to get what they need or reach their goal. Making themselves an obstacle.
~Then projecting blame onto the person for not being able to get the task done, not getting it done quickly, or not doing what they need to in order to get past the extra obstacles.
~Getting angry at the person when they don't follow wrong information or instructions, or when they get past the extra obstacles, or when they get the task done another way.
~Projecting negative judgments on the person for being insistent that the N. does their job, or does it correctly, or stops putting obstacles in their way, or treats them with respect, or leaves them alone so they can do it properly.
Unfortunately there seems to be more and more people in the workforce and government who behave this way. Making one's self an obstacle is a common form of control, and it's also a way to be "involved" with other people, get attention, and create an image of "importance" for one's self. It's also a way to make money, or to collect a paycheck; making one's self a "middle man".
~If I can just go to the shed and get my lawnmower, I don't "need" someone to get it FOR me.
If I know how to check the oil and fill the tank, I don't need someone to do that FOR me.
If I can go get the oil and gas myself, I don't need someone to get it FOR me.
And that means someone else will NOT have the opportunity to give me wrong information about any of those things so when they're not around, I won't be able to do it myself.
Nor will they have control over any of those things, so they won't be able to keep any of them from me when I need them.
But if they can make themselves a "middle man" between me and my lawnmower, then they have all kinds of control over the lawnmower and my use of the lawnmower, and WHEN I can use it, and they're likely to tell me how and then try to charge me for that advice. And they can easily collect some sort of price from me either directly or in a hidden way because they know I need the lawnmower. I might just give up and pay them to mow the lawn altogether just to avoid the stress.
~Making it difficult for a person to get even simple tasks done:
creating extra steps, extra obstacles, extra hardship, extra drama, and even giving wrong or incomplete information or instruction.
~Inserting themselves in between a person and their goal, so the person has to go through them to get what they need or reach their goal. Making themselves an obstacle.
~Then projecting blame onto the person for not being able to get the task done, not getting it done quickly, or not doing what they need to in order to get past the extra obstacles.
~Getting angry at the person when they don't follow wrong information or instructions, or when they get past the extra obstacles, or when they get the task done another way.
~Projecting negative judgments on the person for being insistent that the N. does their job, or does it correctly, or stops putting obstacles in their way, or treats them with respect, or leaves them alone so they can do it properly.
Unfortunately there seems to be more and more people in the workforce and government who behave this way. Making one's self an obstacle is a common form of control, and it's also a way to be "involved" with other people, get attention, and create an image of "importance" for one's self. It's also a way to make money, or to collect a paycheck; making one's self a "middle man".
~If I can just go to the shed and get my lawnmower, I don't "need" someone to get it FOR me.
If I know how to check the oil and fill the tank, I don't need someone to do that FOR me.
If I can go get the oil and gas myself, I don't need someone to get it FOR me.
And that means someone else will NOT have the opportunity to give me wrong information about any of those things so when they're not around, I won't be able to do it myself.
Nor will they have control over any of those things, so they won't be able to keep any of them from me when I need them.
But if they can make themselves a "middle man" between me and my lawnmower, then they have all kinds of control over the lawnmower and my use of the lawnmower, and WHEN I can use it, and they're likely to tell me how and then try to charge me for that advice. And they can easily collect some sort of price from me either directly or in a hidden way because they know I need the lawnmower. I might just give up and pay them to mow the lawn altogether just to avoid the stress.
