Hating Narcissists

One of the obvious problems that happens with any kind of mass awakening and healing (racism, sexism, religionism, dictatorship, political corruption, narcissism) is that so many humans will just use it to make a NEW prejudice, a NEW "Us Against Them", and pigeonhole entire groups of people.
Such as:
Non-white Caucasians WERE oppressed in some countries at certain periods of history, denying that... is silly, it's real and it's true. What's NOT TRUE is that all Caucasians were of the same mind about it. If it were not for Caucasians who fought AGAINST it, risking life and limb, risking everything, it would not have been defeated. It may have been overturned in time, but denying that Caucasians fought with everything they had to defeat it is just as racist as the other way around. And YET, there are huge numbers of humans who actually DENY that, and desperately try to make every Caucasian the same, as if everyone born with lighter skin is automatically RACIST against anyone else. This is literally an insane belief, because it is so far from reality that it's not funny. Believing that all Caucasians are automatically racist is literally insane, like believing that the world is flat, even though there is obvious proof and evidence that it's round.
So, THEN, in response to this assumption by one racist group that all Caucasians are racist, certain Caucasians that rise to personal defensiveness about that pigeonhole all non-Caucasians as "Against US". So they can not even speak to a person of African descent without assuming that the person is against them.
They are ALL creating MORE racism, MORE problems, MORE drama, and MORE serious issues for the world, and for their poor children to have to deal with.
 

Also NOT TRUE: 
That white Caucasians have not been enslaved or oppressed, that's ridiculous, of COURSE they have.
That other races don't enslave or oppress other races, or their OWN race; throughout human history, and  right now as we speak in the world there is incredible oppression, slavery, and disgusting, horrific violence being committed BY other races, AGAINST other races, and against their OWN people, children included.  

Hate obliterates facts and reality. People who hate REFUSE to look at actual evidence or even at what's right in front of their face.

The awakening to Narcissism is causing a similar problem. We have every right to be pissed off, and vent, and expose it. We have definitely been mistreated, some of us for decades, by multiple people, in all kinds of way, in ridiculous ways that have oppressed us, hurt our very lives, our families, our futures, changed the entire course of our lives and of our loved ones.
We have finally found our voice, and a way to expose the methods and come together and find healing.
The one thing we really need to be careful of is that we don't do the "HATE" thing. That's what oppressors do, not us. Hate has NO POWER, and it's not the same thing as ANGER. I have every right to feel angry about the things that others have done to me, damn straight I do. Trying to shut down my anger is obviously just another Narc. tactic, one of the main strategies. But my ANGER is not the same as HATE. As soon as I start feeling hatred toward one of the people who have "Narc'd" me, I know I am heading toward a place that is not where I want to be, that is all about negativity, there's no light there, it's just acidic nowhere land. It gives me a temporary false sense of power and superiority, but it's where OPPRESSORS live, not me. Hate is the forfeit of reason, healing, learning, and growth. Hate is giving up, and laying down, and gets off on CAUSING pain. That's not who I am, or what I want for myself.

Hating all who show Narcissism traits is redundant anyway, every human on Earth has Narcissism traits. The "disorder" is when we are in DENIAL of having Narc. traits, because denying it means we can't GROW OUT of our Narc. traits. If humans weren't born with self-centeredness, most of us would die in infancy. The cries for "Feed Me!" "Change Me!" "I'm Tired!" "Pick Me Up!" are what prompts MOST adults to do any of those things in a timely manner, whether they want to admit that or not. We humans aren't automatically perfect, guru Parents just because we have a child (you can tell that by the state of the society), so babies and children HAVE TO be self-protective and express their needs so we do what they need us to do. (Being an overbearing parent who constantly gives a child what they THINK they need before the child can ever ask for it is not healthy either.)

We don't need to start another Witch Hunt, or another Prejudice "Us against Them" mentality, where we condemn every human who shows signs of Narcissism, that's actually a Narc. behavior all by itself.
All men aren't Narcs, all women aren't Narcs, all attractive people aren't Narcs, all people with BPD aren't Narcs, and further, all Narcs are not vicious and violent. They're just people who have a mental illness. Hating them actually gives Narcissism MORE power, because it gives them a sympathetic reason to defend themselves. You can see this in the same way people will sympathize with Misogynists (woman-haters) when they are defending themselves against fake feminists who are really just Anti-Male. They hijack the "Feminism" platform to spew their hate, and completely SKEW what feminism really is, which is what the Anti-Female groups WANT. (I personally have a feeling that some of the male-hating fake-feminists are political plants, like shills in a casino.)

When we hate, we put ourselves in darkness, in the same darkness the oppressor lives in.


~M.M.Black 2013
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