Fantasy Land: Most Narcissists Can't SEE YOU

Remember, a person who has Narcissism can't actually SEE you. They see and hear a made-up version of you, like a cartoon or a doll, or maybe a comic book character.
That's why they don't give you feedback that matches what you're saying or doing; they are not actually living in the same "world" that you're living in. They're living in a world that they've created, and you are a character in that world.

Your character can't ever have the LEAD ROLE, because THEY have the Lead Role in all scenes, even the ones they're not IN.
Your character is based on their imagination and how they want your character to FIT INTO THEIR WORLD, not on anything real about YOU. 

They don't treat you like a real person because to a Narcissist, you're not. They are the one who "wrote" who and what you are! They don't need to FIND OUT anything about you...

They don't treat you with "respect" or CARE because you're not a "real person" (to them). More like a doll, like a GI JOE or a Barbie, or a TV character (pick a Brady Bunch character, or Little House on the Prairie...  Bonanza... CSI... ER... or maybe General Hospital), or a character stereotype they like to talk about with their BUDDIES... or maybe you can be a pet, like a goldfish or a hamster. Whatever or whoever you kind of look like, whatever they can MATCH your appearance to is apparently who and what you ARE, and they will treat you according the character they've made of you FOREVER.

This is a COGNITION PROBLEM.
Narcissists typically can't discern their imagination from reality.

(Except for sociopaths who can, but don't care.)

Ever notice how Narcissists don't seem to remember much detail about you?
They keep treating you like you DON'T KNOW certain things, DON'T UNDERSTAND certain things, CAN'T DO certain things, or AREN'T CAPABLE of certain things?
Or keep treating you like your feelings, experiences, motives, and behaviors are completely different from what they really are?
>>>Because they don't CARE ABOUT details or FACTS about you. Not real ones anyway. 

Simple Truth About Rejection By A Narcissist

Narcissists don't reject people because they actually did something wrong, like attack someone, slander someone, steal, lie, sabotage, endanger children, or be mean.

They reject people because the person didn't agree with them, comply with their demands, stroke their ego, let them be the superior one, give them what they want, or because they didn't fit in with their clique.

It's important to be aware of Narcissism because those who have it aren't trustworthy, and tend to manipulate and abuse. They are quick to envy and have a lack of empathy for others; they tend to lack a moral compass, and will hurt others to get what they want. They tend to sabotage others who they envy, they tend to use threats, to bully, gossip, lie, avoid responsibility, cheat, steal, con, and they tend to enjoy humiliating others and trying to destroy their reputations. Narcissists can't stand to help others, except in cases where they see a reward in it for themselves. They will do things that others would never think of doing in order to get something they want, to be in control of a situation, another person, or another person's possessions, and to maintain a certain image.

Envying Others For Their "Happy Lives"

Narcissists who are driven by envy (not all of them are, some are driven only by supply) will often target those who appear to them to have caring families and support from friends or community.

Since Narcissists don't care about actual reality, they will make sweeping assumptions regarding another person's support network based on very little superficial information.

For example, if they think a person is physically attractive, they'll often assume that everyone supports and favors the person.
If the person has some kind of academic or business success, they'll often assume likewise, that the person's achievements were only possible because of support or favoritism from others.
Displays of talent or skill also may incite them to envy for the same reasons; they assume that a musician who plays on stage is adored by everyone, or that an artist is treated like royalty, or that a scientist or high achieving student is given special privilege.

People who appear HAPPY, relaxed, confident, and optimistic are often assumed by enviers to have easy and privileged lives.

WEIRDLY, this can and often does happen WITHIN a small community, classroom, family, and even in the same household.

Envy is not just about the actual THING that an envier is focused on. It's also about what they think that thing IMPLIES (in their minds).


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Stereotyping And Misinterpreting Emotional Expressions

People who have injured or weakened identity issues, or who have been purposely taught stereotypes as if they're real, often DISMISS, misinterpret, and refuse to recognize certain emotions and expressions in others, due to the person's sex, coloring, size, or overall appearance.

For example, they will often misinterpret any non-joyous emotional expression coming from a MAN as "anger" or "rage".
A man could be crying, soaked in tears, quite obviously sad, hurt, or consumed by grief, and the person will interpret his demeanor, expression, and even tears as "RAGE" or "anger".
When men express FEAR, it's also often completely misinterpreted as "anger" or "rage".

~This can be difficult for a person who doesn't have this issue to understand, but it's real; it has to do with editing reality to make it fit inside of one's comfort and expectation zone.

Likewise, many will entirely refuse to acknowledge that a woman is expressing anger. THEY can't handle women being angry, so they just pretend that the woman's expression is something ELSE.
They'll often misinterpret a woman's or girl's anger as fear, sadness, anxiety, "instability", CHASTISEMENT, or aggression.

Fear is also often misinterpreted as anger, "grumpiness", or arrogance.

This can be incredibly frustrating when one is trying to express something. Being completely misinterpreted because of another person's stereotype issues means that communication with this person is not possible. They will simply misinterpret everything you say. They'll keep treating you according to their stereotype of what you look like to them, not what you're actually SAYING.

People with this issue will often misinterpret emotional expressions, or even straight speech, from those of a different race, ancestry, or even coloring, as well as sex and age.
They have a FIXED EXPECTATION in their head of what the other person is going to say, how they feel, what their motives are, and what they're going to mean when they speak.
They don't have the ability to objectively or accurately interpret the other person's expression or speech.

They will even REFUSE TO RECOGNIZE HUMOR coming from certain people who don't fit the stereotype in their head of "who is funny".

They will refuse to recognize or acknowledge all kinds of things about other people because something doesn't FIT the stereotype in their head of the way the person LOOKS: their sex, their age, their ancestry, their weight, their size, their facial features, etc.

(Pro comedians know all about it, so do advertising pros, and so do Politicians).