Narcissism Looks Like This
The
single biggest difference between a Narcissist and a Non-Narcissist is
how worried they are about BEING a Narcissist. A person who is afflicted
will dismiss the concept altogether, as if it's Poppycock... or,
dismiss the idea that they could have it... or, completely deny having
it... or, dismiss, vilify, oppose and devalue anyone who talks about the
disorder or supports abuse victims. (A Narcissist also may devalue
abuse victims/targets in general. This contributes to their denial
issues, since most Narcissists were actually victims of some form of
abuse at some point.)
If a Narcissist sees a list of traits,
they will pick through them and find the ones that don't apply, and use
those as evidence that they are NOT "Narcissists".
A NON-Narcissist
will read the same list, and recognizing a couple in themselves, will
immediately feel a twinge of worry that they have the disorder, and
worry about what kind of problems they have been causing or how they
have hurt others.
A list of Narcissism traits, if he or she reads
it at all, will invoke emotions like annoyance, defensiveness, or anger
for a person with Narcissism.
Narcissists rarely go to therapy
for any reason at all; they won't go to help themselves, and they will
rarely go for or about someone else. They don't care about the
afflictions of others, they don't try to learn about them, they don't
try to understand them, they don't have any interest in helping them
heal. The only reason a Narcissist will go to therapy is to get a
counselor to agree with them about what's wrong with another person, and
to try to get the counselor to agree that they are a victim of this
person, and that this person is truly the "problem" in everyone's lives.
They can't conceive that there is more than one person involved who is
contributing to the issues and problems, the "blame" has to lie squarely
on one person's shoulders, and NOT on their own, at all. They have to
remain blame-free at all costs in their own minds.
