We humans only allow ourselves to learn from
and hear the points of view of those we don't already judge to be "lower
status" than ourselves.
In other words, first we judge another person as "lower", "equal to", or "above" ourselves, and then we listen or don't listen to them based on that judgment.
A large number of us will only learn from and listen to those we have judged as "above".
Some of us will learn from and listen to those we have judged as "equal" to ourselves.
MOST of us will block out out anyone whom we have judged to be "lower" than ourselves. We even become indignant or annoyed when someone we have judged as "lower" speaks of their experiences, or shares their knowledge or point of view, or even behaves confidently.
Few people are even aware of their own judging for status, and few are able to get past this compulsion and are able to hear and listen to others objectively.
We also hide it from others when we're not sure how they are judging the person we're listening to. If we're worried that our group judges a person to be "lower", then we are often too afraid of their judging US by association. So for example on Facebook, we will see one person's posts with many "likes", regardless of the content of the post, and another's with very few "likes", even if the post is very interesting or informative. We want to be seen as like-minded to our group, so they'll keep accepting us, so we hit "like" when other people do, and avoid hitting "like" when other people have not. We don't want our friends to see us associating with, listening to, or agreeing with someone who they might be judging as "lower" or "weird" or "uncool". Most of us are really quite the followers, and are much more afraid of our group's judgments than we admit.
The ways in which we judge others are usually very primitive, and mostly nonsensical, based on superficial markers we have set in our subconscious. If we could see just how primitive and baseless most of our "judging" really is, and how far away from logic and reality, we would probably feel quite embarrassed.
In other words, first we judge another person as "lower", "equal to", or "above" ourselves, and then we listen or don't listen to them based on that judgment.
A large number of us will only learn from and listen to those we have judged as "above".
Some of us will learn from and listen to those we have judged as "equal" to ourselves.
MOST of us will block out out anyone whom we have judged to be "lower" than ourselves. We even become indignant or annoyed when someone we have judged as "lower" speaks of their experiences, or shares their knowledge or point of view, or even behaves confidently.
Few people are even aware of their own judging for status, and few are able to get past this compulsion and are able to hear and listen to others objectively.
We also hide it from others when we're not sure how they are judging the person we're listening to. If we're worried that our group judges a person to be "lower", then we are often too afraid of their judging US by association. So for example on Facebook, we will see one person's posts with many "likes", regardless of the content of the post, and another's with very few "likes", even if the post is very interesting or informative. We want to be seen as like-minded to our group, so they'll keep accepting us, so we hit "like" when other people do, and avoid hitting "like" when other people have not. We don't want our friends to see us associating with, listening to, or agreeing with someone who they might be judging as "lower" or "weird" or "uncool". Most of us are really quite the followers, and are much more afraid of our group's judgments than we admit.
The ways in which we judge others are usually very primitive, and mostly nonsensical, based on superficial markers we have set in our subconscious. If we could see just how primitive and baseless most of our "judging" really is, and how far away from logic and reality, we would probably feel quite embarrassed.
