Ego And Control

The ego is the number one important thing in a Controller or Narcissist's life.
This is clearly demonstrated in how they will often attack, despise, or shun one person for simply not recognizing their "power", "toughness", or self-claimed "authority", or for refusing to give them extra sympathy, extra leniency, or extra recognition (NOT equal with what they would GIVE to another, especially the person they expect it from, but MORE, EXTRA)-,
but they will often LOOK THE OTHER WAY when someone does something criminal, violent, or terrible, especially when it was done to someone else. 

Controllers and Narcissists don't necessarily react negatively to others for terrible acts, even when those acts are done to those in their personal life, such as a family member, partner, friend, neighbor or coworker.

But they will often viciously "turn on" anyone who challenges or pricks their ego, either purposely or inadvertently, including those who are supposedly "close" to them, who they claim to "care about". 

They WILL however often pour out recognition, sympathy and even help for people they DON'T KNOW, while ignoring, demeaning, and turning on those in their personal life, no matter what happens to them, and no matter what they do or accomplish.

It's all about protecting the ego, self-preservation, feeling in-control, feeling superior and dominant, and building and maintaining image.