Basic parameters for treatment of the opposite sex:
> If you would not say it to one of your same-sex friends because it's demeaning, disrespectful or presumptuous, then why would you say it to a member of the opposite sex?
> How do you show genuine respect and friendship to your comrades of the same sex? Do at least that (not LESS than that) toward members of the opposite sex.
> What is your "ethics code"? What are your personal integrity parameters? It's not integrity if you only do it sometimes with certain people, but not with others.
> Basic manners and courtesy. If you wouldn't "blow off" or lie to one of your same-sex friends because it's wrong or lame, then why on earth would you do that to a person of the opposite sex?
> Pay attention. Other people don't come in some kind of prefab packages. Each human has different strengths and talents, experiences, wisdom, knowledge, and points of view. No one is some kind of "clone" of others who are the same sex, height, race, or hair color. Grow up. No two women are the same, and no two men are the same, no matter how deep someone's personal gender biases and issues are.
> Don't assume you know anything at all about another person, especially based on their sex, body, age, or appearance. That is one of the most naive and ignorant things that humans seem to stay stuck in developmentally.
That big hulking African-looking guy you just saw might be the sweetest person you ever met, loves baby animals, children, his Mom, can't play basketball, has a degree in physics, enjoys software programming, cooks dinner for his wife every night, is an avid quilter, is not a Democrat, lost all of his siblings in a terrible accident, who's best friend is his female cousin who helps people in their community with him.
That small blond woman with the voluptuous figure, with dirt on her hands you just saw might be the most humble person you ever met, who drag races and restores vintage cars, who's a master carpenter, who rescues abused animals, helps all of her elderly neighbors, paints portraits, studied biology and chemistry, has survived a severely abusive childhood in foster care, does not belong to a political party, and loves her children and her husband, who love and respect her back.
Both of them are Science Fiction fans, neither can stand Television Soap Operas or reality shows, both can take or leave professional sports, and would much rather play sports with close friends and family just for fun.
None of it could have been "assumed" or "guessed", one would have to actually get to know them to find out any of these things.
> If you would not say it to one of your same-sex friends because it's demeaning, disrespectful or presumptuous, then why would you say it to a member of the opposite sex?
> How do you show genuine respect and friendship to your comrades of the same sex? Do at least that (not LESS than that) toward members of the opposite sex.
> What is your "ethics code"? What are your personal integrity parameters? It's not integrity if you only do it sometimes with certain people, but not with others.
> Basic manners and courtesy. If you wouldn't "blow off" or lie to one of your same-sex friends because it's wrong or lame, then why on earth would you do that to a person of the opposite sex?
> Pay attention. Other people don't come in some kind of prefab packages. Each human has different strengths and talents, experiences, wisdom, knowledge, and points of view. No one is some kind of "clone" of others who are the same sex, height, race, or hair color. Grow up. No two women are the same, and no two men are the same, no matter how deep someone's personal gender biases and issues are.
> Don't assume you know anything at all about another person, especially based on their sex, body, age, or appearance. That is one of the most naive and ignorant things that humans seem to stay stuck in developmentally.
That big hulking African-looking guy you just saw might be the sweetest person you ever met, loves baby animals, children, his Mom, can't play basketball, has a degree in physics, enjoys software programming, cooks dinner for his wife every night, is an avid quilter, is not a Democrat, lost all of his siblings in a terrible accident, who's best friend is his female cousin who helps people in their community with him.
That small blond woman with the voluptuous figure, with dirt on her hands you just saw might be the most humble person you ever met, who drag races and restores vintage cars, who's a master carpenter, who rescues abused animals, helps all of her elderly neighbors, paints portraits, studied biology and chemistry, has survived a severely abusive childhood in foster care, does not belong to a political party, and loves her children and her husband, who love and respect her back.
Both of them are Science Fiction fans, neither can stand Television Soap Operas or reality shows, both can take or leave professional sports, and would much rather play sports with close friends and family just for fun.
None of it could have been "assumed" or "guessed", one would have to actually get to know them to find out any of these things.
