Anxiety in Dysfunctional Environments

Codependent and Narcissistic environments often find a person with seemingly free-floating negative feelings that don't appear to be attached to specific events. However, if one were to observe closely and objective, one would fine that specific events are quite present, just covered up, rationalized, or justified. A person in such an environment can find themselves with: 

~A pervasive feeling of doing something wrong or inadequate, no matter what one is doing or what's going on

~the feeling of being less capable of doing things or learning how to do things than others

~the feeling that others believe one to be incapable, weak, less intelligent, clumsy, or emotionally unstable

~a feeling of always waiting for the "other shoe to drop";anxiety about social or group situations

~feelings of dread about social, school, or work situations or other group situations 

~suspicion or knowledge that one is being gossiped about, triangulated against, sabotaged, slandered, or plotted against

~suspicion or awareness of disrespectful, cold, unfair, unethical, uncaring, or even cruel treatment from an individual, or others in a group

~the feeling that events, plans, and information are being hidden or lied about

~the feeling that others seem to "see" a person as very different from who or what one is really like

~pervasive, ongoing guilt and shame for not being able to make others completely happy, for not doing enough for them in daily regular life, for not being nice enough, available enough, generous enough no matter what one does, and even if others are able-bodied and not suffering from trauma or illness.

~feeling like a "lower-status" person in a group


~may try to dominate or scapegoat others in the group, or try to make them look or feel like they're "lower status" in order to remedy one's own feelings

~feeling frustrated like one is being blocked, ignored, and dismissed

~feeling like one is self-centered, selfish, arrogant and narcissistic when doing basic self-care, buying basic self-care products, maintaining or buying things that are considered "normal" in the society, or even buying or making food for one's self.

 ~feeling like one is self-centered, selfish, arrogant and narcissistic when making positive announcements about one's own self, aspirations, plans, and life, or when seeking sympathy, empathy, or help when needing anything or dealing with hardship

~feeling shame or guilt for other feelings such as sadness, frustration, anger, fear, anxiety, enthusiasm, happiness, joy, or excitement

~feeling shame, guilt, anxiety, even frustration, desperation, or depression around holidays and other celebrations; and when there is any scheduling issue regarding other people.

~feeling shame, guilt, or anxiety (sometimes even panic) whenever one is trying to get something specific done that is not FOR someone else.

~feeling like one is blamed too often, judged too harshly, treated unfairly, and uncared for by both individuals and the group in general.

~feeling like one is being watched and reported on



If these feelings seem familiar, look up "Invalidation", "Passive Aggressive", "Codependency" and "Narcissism". There is quite a lot of information available right on the Internet to help one learn about what they're dealing with, both with the other people around them, and with themselves.


A couple of recommended links:
Light's Blog
Redlight Runners Anonymous 
Passive Aggressive