And yes, they DO blow people off when they get bored, no matter what the actual situation or relationship is.
If you're talking about something that's upsetting you for "too long",
and they're hungry, the N's stomach is going to "win"; it won't even
occur to them to ask you if you want to eat with them.
They
want to get AWAY from you, because they're BORED with you and your
"problems", or just bored because they aren't doing something THEY want
to do.
It doesn't matter if you're upset about breaking a
nail, or upset about the death of your parent. When they're bored,
they're GONE, doing something else.
Call it A.D.D. if you
want, they probably will... (You can tell it's NOT "A.D.D." when they
talk at length about themselves, without any trouble staying on topic,
and without seeming to have anything pressing to do.)
When they get bored visiting their child, partner, or other relative or close friend in the hospital, they're outta there.
When they get bored in an important ceremony or tradition, they're out the door.
When they get bored while doing their agreed upon job, paid or unpaid, they don't "keep at it" anyway, they "ditch" it.
When they get bored watching their children's school play, they'll
either start talking to someone about something irrelevant to the play,
get on their cell phone, or "duck out for a minute"...
If they find their children's soccer games boring, they might not even show up at all.
When they get "bored" with being in a relationship with one person,
they FIND SOMEONE ELSE. When they get bored with the new person, they
either try to go back to the old one, or they again find someone else.
To a Narcissist, "Boredom" equals "Time to blow off whatever I was
doing, EVEN IF it will hurt someone, even if I'm leaving someone in a
lurch, even if I'm getting paid, even if it will destroy my marriage,
even if it will cause my children pain or trauma, even if I'm under
contract, even if I am being relied upon by someone who is in serious
need of support or care."
To be sure, if YOU get bored doing
something that THEY want you to do, even if it's watching a documentary
of "Historic Football Passes", or five sitcoms in a row, or listening to
them for an hour straight talk about their golf club or knitting circle
(that you of course don't belong to because you weren't invited), or
about their past operations, illnesses, injuries, or accomplishments,
they will EXPECT YOU to be FASCINATED, or to stay with them, keep doing
whatever it is, or listening to them no matter WHAT ELSE you need to do.
It's just another one of those "The world revolves around ME,
but definitely NOT YOU" behaviors that Narcissists live their life
doing.
