Picture
a person with Narcissism standing in front of a storage tent. Their
whole life is inside the tent, everything they do, everything they own.
They're standing in front of the door, blocking it so no one else can
come in. Everything in the tent is THEIRS, and THEIR BUSINESS ONLY, "for
their eyes only". They are very protective of the contents of their
tent, and rarely invite anyone in.
Those who do get invited in become one of the Narcissist's possessions (not in reality, just in the N's mind).
Those who get invited in are not allowed to "explore", or to ask questions about anything.
Those who are invited in are not allowed autonomy, nor their own thoughts, feelings, or opinions. Inside the N's tent, everyone has to cater completely and fully to the N. with no question about anything, no differing opinions, no talents, skills, or even knowledge that the N. doesn't have, and no expression of any discomfort, pain, annoyance, anger, or sadness.
When they've targeted a person, the Target's "storage tent" is expected to be wide open for the Narcissist to come and go whenever they please, invited or uninvited. The N. feels entitled to ownership of all contents inside the Target's tent, and feels entitled to know every detail about everything. The N. feels entitled to criticize, correct, or throw away anything at all inside the Target's tent.
In order to have easier access, the N. might demand that the Target take down the very walls of their tent.
The N. might have a yard sale with the Target's possessions.
The N. might simply give them away.
They might invite other people into the Target's tent.
The N. feels entitled to dictate what a Target can or can't bring into their own tent, or remove from their own tent, because the N. believes that he or she owns the Target, the Target's tent, and all of its contents.
The "rules" that the N. puts on his or her OWN tent for others to follow are completely different from the "rules" the N. imposes on the Target, and on the Target's tent.
The N. feels that he or she literally deserves and is entitled to complete control over the Target and everything about the Target, and the Target's entire tent, but that the Target has ZERO entitlement, authority, or control over the N, or the N's tent, or the contents therein, and not even over the Target's OWN tent, either.
So, the Narcissist feels ownership and entitlement over BOTH TENTS, and feels entitlement to COMPLETE RESPECT AND PRIVACY for THEMSELVES, and will defend that privacy passionately, with righteousness, ...but does NOT AT ALL respect the privacy, personhood, possessions, or anything else about the Target or within the Target's tent.
Those who do get invited in become one of the Narcissist's possessions (not in reality, just in the N's mind).
Those who get invited in are not allowed to "explore", or to ask questions about anything.
Those who are invited in are not allowed autonomy, nor their own thoughts, feelings, or opinions. Inside the N's tent, everyone has to cater completely and fully to the N. with no question about anything, no differing opinions, no talents, skills, or even knowledge that the N. doesn't have, and no expression of any discomfort, pain, annoyance, anger, or sadness.
When they've targeted a person, the Target's "storage tent" is expected to be wide open for the Narcissist to come and go whenever they please, invited or uninvited. The N. feels entitled to ownership of all contents inside the Target's tent, and feels entitled to know every detail about everything. The N. feels entitled to criticize, correct, or throw away anything at all inside the Target's tent.
In order to have easier access, the N. might demand that the Target take down the very walls of their tent.
The N. might have a yard sale with the Target's possessions.
The N. might simply give them away.
They might invite other people into the Target's tent.
The N. feels entitled to dictate what a Target can or can't bring into their own tent, or remove from their own tent, because the N. believes that he or she owns the Target, the Target's tent, and all of its contents.
The "rules" that the N. puts on his or her OWN tent for others to follow are completely different from the "rules" the N. imposes on the Target, and on the Target's tent.
The N. feels that he or she literally deserves and is entitled to complete control over the Target and everything about the Target, and the Target's entire tent, but that the Target has ZERO entitlement, authority, or control over the N, or the N's tent, or the contents therein, and not even over the Target's OWN tent, either.
So, the Narcissist feels ownership and entitlement over BOTH TENTS, and feels entitlement to COMPLETE RESPECT AND PRIVACY for THEMSELVES, and will defend that privacy passionately, with righteousness, ...but does NOT AT ALL respect the privacy, personhood, possessions, or anything else about the Target or within the Target's tent.
