Another very common Controller/Narcissist behavior:
Putting themselves in the "Lead" position in any situation, and especially when the situation already had a "Leader".
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~Taking over another person's project, big or small.
~Acting like an idea someone else had was their own, and taking over the "planning" and "delegation".
~Taking the "lead" after being asked to assist.
~Making themselves out to be an Expert when someone asks their opinion, or just a question (not just answering the question).
~Inserting themselves in a person's project or task when NOT being asked to assist (more severely, trying to take over the task or project without even being asked to assist).
~Standing and watching as a self-assigned "Supervisor" while someone else is doing something, and volunteering advice and criticism.
~Taking it upon themselves to "assist" total strangers who did not ask for assistance, in a tone that implies the stranger is NOT CAPABLE of the task they're doing.
~Giving orders, delegating tasks, and implying that someone is "forgetting something", or is about to make a mistake, in someone else's project, plan, or idea, just for the purpose of giving themselves a feeling of "Leadership" over others.
These are all domination display behaviors.
Many primates and other animals get a chemical reward from the feeling of domination, and will try to get a "fix" from that chemical whenever they can.
And, since those who are addicted to this chemical reward are addicts, they may become very agitated, even angry, sometimes enraged, if one does not ALLOW them to get their fix.
The behavior is often learned from an older family member, but could also be learned from outside the family.
The behavior suggests that the person was not taught how to treat others with respect, or why they should be treated with respect, or what that looks like.
OR, the person may have been taught by someone outside the family that their values were "wrong", and that they should be more controlling and domineering toward certain others, and that it's perfectly okay to "get off" on the feeling it brings.
(Which can easily lead to a person getting hooked on that chemical reward fix from domination.)
It also suggests that the person may have been taught that only certain people should be treated with respect (whatever that might mean in that circle), but that it's fine to assert "control" or "leadership" over others, or that it's fine to rebel against the "Lead" of those certain others.
Therefore, the person feels perfectly ENTITLED to assert control and domination over certain people, as if there's nothing at all wrong with it, and if a person protests, then that person is the one doing something "wrong"; besides, the person is blocking their fix.
To be clear, for example, in a culture where one sex is treated with less respect than the other, BOTH sexes will treat that sex with less respect than the other. So people from BOTH sexes will often try to take over the projects or rebel against the "Lead" of people of the one sex, but not the other. They were BOTH taught through modeling from adults that it's fine to assert control over one type of person, and get the chemical reward from domination, but to allow control and accept leadership FROM another type of person.
They can also get a neurochemical reward from following and being lead by certain types of people, so they're getting a chemical fix BOTH from dominating one type of person, and ALSO from FOLLOWING another type of person.
And since this is usually a cultural behavior, they give themselves yet ANOTHER chemical fix from following the CROWD, doing a behavior that's accepted by others and therefore being accepted in the group.
Just because someone gets a rush from domination and tries to do it a lot does NOT mean they are CAPABLE of LEADERSHIP, or MORE CAPABLE, experienced, talented, informed, or intelligent than the person or people they are trying to "Lead".
In conclusion, those who try to assert control and Leadership over others when they were not invited to do so are probably seeking a neurochemical reward, either because they think they're "doing the right thing", or purely from the rush they get directly from dominating others. Those who rebel against the assigned Leadership of others are quite often also seeking a similar chemical reward. Those who FOLLOW and accept Leadership from one type of person (but not another) are also most likely seeking a chemical reward. A "fix". So, anyone who gets in the way of their fix is not going to be taken kindly to.
Be prepared; bucking cultural stereotypes and "hierarchy" behaviors means messing with addicts who don't know they're addicts.
And yes, we are all susceptible, because we are all human. It doesn't make it "okay" or "right" just because we're all susceptible; we're all susceptible to viruses and infection as well.
Putting themselves in the "Lead" position in any situation, and especially when the situation already had a "Leader".
~
~Taking over another person's project, big or small.
~Acting like an idea someone else had was their own, and taking over the "planning" and "delegation".
~Taking the "lead" after being asked to assist.
~Making themselves out to be an Expert when someone asks their opinion, or just a question (not just answering the question).
~Inserting themselves in a person's project or task when NOT being asked to assist (more severely, trying to take over the task or project without even being asked to assist).
~Standing and watching as a self-assigned "Supervisor" while someone else is doing something, and volunteering advice and criticism.
~Taking it upon themselves to "assist" total strangers who did not ask for assistance, in a tone that implies the stranger is NOT CAPABLE of the task they're doing.
~Giving orders, delegating tasks, and implying that someone is "forgetting something", or is about to make a mistake, in someone else's project, plan, or idea, just for the purpose of giving themselves a feeling of "Leadership" over others.
These are all domination display behaviors.
Many primates and other animals get a chemical reward from the feeling of domination, and will try to get a "fix" from that chemical whenever they can.
And, since those who are addicted to this chemical reward are addicts, they may become very agitated, even angry, sometimes enraged, if one does not ALLOW them to get their fix.
The behavior is often learned from an older family member, but could also be learned from outside the family.
The behavior suggests that the person was not taught how to treat others with respect, or why they should be treated with respect, or what that looks like.
OR, the person may have been taught by someone outside the family that their values were "wrong", and that they should be more controlling and domineering toward certain others, and that it's perfectly okay to "get off" on the feeling it brings.
(Which can easily lead to a person getting hooked on that chemical reward fix from domination.)
It also suggests that the person may have been taught that only certain people should be treated with respect (whatever that might mean in that circle), but that it's fine to assert "control" or "leadership" over others, or that it's fine to rebel against the "Lead" of those certain others.
Therefore, the person feels perfectly ENTITLED to assert control and domination over certain people, as if there's nothing at all wrong with it, and if a person protests, then that person is the one doing something "wrong"; besides, the person is blocking their fix.
To be clear, for example, in a culture where one sex is treated with less respect than the other, BOTH sexes will treat that sex with less respect than the other. So people from BOTH sexes will often try to take over the projects or rebel against the "Lead" of people of the one sex, but not the other. They were BOTH taught through modeling from adults that it's fine to assert control over one type of person, and get the chemical reward from domination, but to allow control and accept leadership FROM another type of person.
They can also get a neurochemical reward from following and being lead by certain types of people, so they're getting a chemical fix BOTH from dominating one type of person, and ALSO from FOLLOWING another type of person.
And since this is usually a cultural behavior, they give themselves yet ANOTHER chemical fix from following the CROWD, doing a behavior that's accepted by others and therefore being accepted in the group.
Just because someone gets a rush from domination and tries to do it a lot does NOT mean they are CAPABLE of LEADERSHIP, or MORE CAPABLE, experienced, talented, informed, or intelligent than the person or people they are trying to "Lead".
In conclusion, those who try to assert control and Leadership over others when they were not invited to do so are probably seeking a neurochemical reward, either because they think they're "doing the right thing", or purely from the rush they get directly from dominating others. Those who rebel against the assigned Leadership of others are quite often also seeking a similar chemical reward. Those who FOLLOW and accept Leadership from one type of person (but not another) are also most likely seeking a chemical reward. A "fix". So, anyone who gets in the way of their fix is not going to be taken kindly to.
Be prepared; bucking cultural stereotypes and "hierarchy" behaviors means messing with addicts who don't know they're addicts.
And yes, we are all susceptible, because we are all human. It doesn't make it "okay" or "right" just because we're all susceptible; we're all susceptible to viruses and infection as well.
